Deeper Level of Connection and Communication

Previously, I said primary relationship was the relationship with True self, Heart, God (if I may use this term), Infinite potential, or the Law - as if to connect with the source of compassion and wisdom --- and to find peace, happiness and harmony.  This may sound funny but it is developing the connection with Heart which we already have.  In any case, we are here to explore ways to develop that relationship, i.e., how to develop the deeper level of connection as if to find a special communication channel.


Generally, we know communication is multifaceted. There is verbal, and there is nonverbal which appeals to five senses.   Yet, from old days, Oriental philosophers said that we have 'sixth sense' to detect the Law of nature on top of five senses.  (Note this is somewhat different from typically used sixth sense as in extrasensory perception or ESP)  We are not what we are as solely captured on the mind movement.  For example, Hypnotist Milton Erickson's observed people while he was immobilized with polio.  People's "yes" in word may be "no" in body language, he said.  We know this in our own experience.  And if so, there may be a conflict of communication within oneself.  Also, how may we detect and address it?  If this is the conflict we have with Heart, may we simply ignore it?


Previously, with posts such as; primary relationship, 50 CM Problem (Brain and Heart), Hypnosis and Aikido, we looked into the deeper level of our being and how our Heart, or True self, may be expressed.  Yes, easy to say, but we need to practice this while our living condition changes constantly - not just within ourselves but also to communicate with others in the most truthful manner.  Such is the nature of communication and connection I believe we should go after.


In business settings, I point to managers that if their mind is disturbed, reactionary, or negatively conditioned, the impact to their organization and the business results could be huge.  I also say, "the shop floor reflects the mind of managers." (The New Shop Floor Management)  In other words, manager's mind is reflected on how people at the shop floor behave.  It shows in people's motivation, the level of housekeeping, quality of products and services, and cost and timeliness of job.  "If the top water is muddy, it cascades down to the rest of the organization."  So, I conduct a short meditation session with managers to be more aware of having the quality of calm and quiet mind.  The situation is no different in any organization, e.g., family.


Many spiritual teachers emphasize, "You need to address yourself first before helping others."  And if we do this successfully always ourselves first, we should be able to bring out the insight and compassion naturally in our daily life.  The title of my book, "Results from the Heart" points this internal link being utmost important to get the results that have meaning.  Brain should communicate with Heart, not act independently.


Previously, I used the Cross of Jesus as reference, i.e., primary (Know Thyself) and secondary (Know Others).  If we see us functioning in these two dimensions, we may see our communication in a different fashion, orienting that, ultimately, everything needs to be aligned connected to the Heart.  This is the meaning of "Living Truthfully," in the post on Life Profile.

An Image of Communication and Connection at Deeper Level

So, how do we connect to the Heart and how do we know if we are actually connected?  Remember? This connection/communication refers the "sixth sense," Asian philosophers mentioned.  When we use that sense with "a calm and quiet mind.", we may be able to say we are living truthfully - connected to the Heart.  Of course, this connection is something each one of us to find.  My view is that there is liveliness or bliss we feel when we are connected, perhaps vibration as inner body sensation.  There is an intuitive feel to it.  More we experience this, we may connect and expand as if into this new dimension more often, like opening the third eye, .


Here are indicative signs of being connected to Heart as I see it, i.e., my experience;

-  Sense of being in present, here and now, choiceless observation, witnessing

-  Vivid sense of inner body sensation, aliveness, liveliness 

(cells jumping around as if very happily)

-  Calm, clear and quiet mind; beginner's mind, no mind, mirror mind

-  Soft eyes...see without seeing - very intuitive, third eye as if opening up a new channel

-  Body/muscle is totally relaxed; There is a sense of effortlessness; no strains felt

-  no ego/self; desirelessness, actionlessness

-  It is as if a new channel opens up by itself from deep within (a new sense of connection)
-  Feeling of all answers are already there (there is no doubt or question any more)

-  Mind and body are felt as one; no boundaries; I am you; I am one with the universe

-  Sense of serenity, peace, arriving/being at home, nothing is missing

-  Wisdom and compassion come naturally; delusions/sufferings/errors are nowhere to find

-  Sense of living truthfully (connection to the Law, the Way); sense of being absolute, imperturbability

-  Sense of Ki (Life energy) manifesting; Blissful sensation spreading over

-  Sense of connection to unconscious/infinite potential (connection of external and internal)

-  Sense of oneness; non-duality

-  Sense of mind and body being 'healthy' and 'genuine'
-  Sense of everything seen as vivid and alive (inside and outside)

-  Sense of love, bliss, and intimacy to all 

-  Sense of time distortion (as if time lost its meaning)

Signs of benefits/awareness:
-  Brain and Heart find a connection
-  Heart to heart  communication between people is possible
-  This deeper level communication may be manifested as wisdom and compassion
-  Paradox of human existence is resolved (in oneness)
-  Bliss in various activities, e.g., work, hobby, relationship, health, and the sense of genuine security in any situation 
-  Discover new meaning of intimacy, e.g., sexual union, non-sexual relationship, Aikido, etc.  The list is infinite.
-  All of these corresponds to "living truthfully"


To sum up, however hard we may feel at times, and however is the thorny bush we may have to go through, the path we are taking as new heroes is precisely for its own good.  It should become more and more self evident as we move on.

Life Profile 1: A Powerful Tool to Navigate Our Life

This simple tool, I call Life Profile (LP), will help guide our path while better utilizing our talent, enjoying and appreciating life.   Specifically, it will enable us to manage our life better in such areas as work, hobby, relationship, health, and finance, while orienting us to live truthfully.  Also, it helps us to balance various activities in life as if plant grows in an organic fashion given its setting, e.g., sun, wind, insect, water, etc.  Then, through engaging in various activities and relationships with LP as a tool, we engage our life toward new possibilities (New DNAs) with partner(s).  

Essentially, through the use of this tool, we start to realize how our life energy flows in a balanced manner even to find us engaging in the manifestation of dynamic energy flow of the whole universe.  So, we can call LP linked to primary relationship, connection to the heart, law of universe.  Or, if I use religious terms, this may correspond to Tao, following the order from heaven (ten-mei), live in the kingdom of heaven.  (Note: the concept of mini-company is a representation of such a dynamic process in a company setting to self-manage while LP is applied for each person to live as the master of destiny. We can do this by; listen to the heart, use our brain, and follow the bliss.  Or, live truthfully.  This is the hero's journey)

If there is a strategy to live our life to the fullest, LP is a tool to assist that.  It can help "monitor" what is happening and how the strategy is working.  Then, it will help "come up with insight", and "find the course" (or strategy) into the future so that we can chart our way in the direction that makes sense, perhaps, as we follow the bliss.

Now, let's take a look at where we are. Thanks to technology and marketing among others, many of us may have developed a habit of seeking for instant gratification, i.e.,quick for everything or blindly reacting to stimuli.  More this, more that; we develop a bad habit. Then, "quantity" become more important, e.g., money, fame, title (may I add sex here as well?). I remember one friend when he was in his thirties he was counting the number of sex he would have in the rest of his life. Fine. But what about quality, or genuine intimacy to "Life"? Without understanding the meaning are we to live as if being chased to do various tasks? If so, do we really feel "alive," appreciating each day, each moment?  Do we hear the song of a bird, see a flower blooming at the roadside, and discover all the miracles happening around us, even to realize that we are the miracle?!

Certainly, we need to have a clear and balanced perspective in life. If we are caught up with small stuff or swung by stimulation, we waste our energy, lose balance, and quality in life will deteriorate. More untruthful actions we take, more wired our brain will be with bad closed circuit. Eventually, we will have to pay it back. All action has consequences if our mind eyes are closed. But if so, what do we do? How do we live our life? I believe the answer is found by having a calm and quiet mind. In other words, with quality in our mind, and observing things as they really are and coming up with insight, we can lead a quality life. Without clear mind, we are blindfolded, unable to see what is going on, and what we are to do in an intelligent and compassionate manner.

If the above point is clear, then how do we use our mind?  Einstein said, "Ask the right question." I think one good question may be to ask, "What is going on?" or "So what? (What is the meaning?)" to get to the core and clarify the meaning. In other words, connect to the heart to find why we are here for (mission) and what we are to do. This is new hero's journey. Ultimately, it is a moment to moment practice. However, we can use LP as an important tool to orient us. More we use this tool, we can balance our life better and find the real meaning.

In the following post, we will look into the specifics of this tool, I call, Life Profile (LP).

Hypnosis and Aikido - 2

In this post, we will look further into the core of Hypnosis and the art of Aikido.  The main focus is for us to know our human psyche better and orient us to change our behavior aiming for an enriched life.  Although some points may be seen as technical, or even counter intuitive for some, I am hopeful that this type of inquiry may possibly bring an eye-opening moment even for hard-nosed managers, power-hungry dictators or even  insensitive bureaucrats.
 (Did I say too much?)  Here, we will focus on two areas:

1)  Use of "Unfocused gaze" or "Soft eyes" (use of peripheral vision) as a way of intuitively assessing the situation by picking up the non-verbal cues:


"Peripheral vision is known to activate the body’s parasympathetic nervous system which decreases the heart and breathing rate.   The therapist then enters a state of deep relaxation and becomes centred.  At this point they become absorbed ‘in the moment’ and develop an almost spontaneous and unconscious response to the client’s behaviour where a conscious deliberation of which techniques to use becomes unnecessary.  The therapist has, in effect, freed themselves of technique and acts intuitively to assist the client.


Similarly the therapist can track discreet physiological shifts and movements in their patient and use this to increase rapport.  By matching the clients breathing rate, posture and voice the therapist can gain a stronger position of trust and influence at the unconscious level.  Peripheral vision allows for an entire range of physiological subtleties to be observed without overt eye movements.


In the martial arts classic ‘The Book of Five Rings’, Miyamoto Musashi said a true swordsman must see far away events as if near and near events as if from far away.  Specifically he highlighted two types of vision: ‘Ken’ and ‘Kan’.  Ken can be likened to fovial or tunnel vision which observes superficial activity.  However Kan is peripheral vision which perceives the underlying essence of things.   For Mushashi, Ken is like seeing with the eyes whereas Kan is seeing with the mind.


The ‘Kan’ state is reflected in the aikido principle of ‘know your partners mind’.  This basically states that knowing an attackers intention will provide a quicker and more effective defence than any rapid physical movement.   In the same sense, intuitively perceiving the client’s problem will allow for a more appropriate and responsive intervention in hypnotherapy." 

- From Hypnosis, Ericksonian Hypnotherapy, and Aikido

As mentioned at the end of the previous post, it points to the state of "no-ego," or having a "calm and quiet mind." while observing everything as they really are - not what they appear on surface.  By cultivating our entire mind-body in this manner, we can become more intuitive and insightful in assessing the situation so that wisdom and compassion can be better manifested. (i.e., truth reveals on its own when the screen of our mind is thrown away)


2)  The way to handle a difficult situation in a skillful manner:


Hypnotherapist, Erickson says: "There are many types of difficult patients who seek psychotherapy and yet are openly hostile... and unwill­ing to accept the therapy they have come to seek . . .[yet]  such resistance should be ... graciously accepted, since it is a vitally important communication of a part of their problems and often can be used as an opening into their defenses."


In Aikido, this is called blending in which the energy of an opponent's attack is never resisted or re­jected. The Aikidoist takes the mental position of welcoming  the attack, both as an opportunity to restore harmony and as a chance to practice the art. An im­portant reframing takes place in the mind of the Aikidoist: The usual notion of an attack being frightening... is replaced by an acceptance and appreciation.... In  both cases, the practitioner views resistance not as a problem one wishes would go away, but rather as essential "raw  energy" that can lead to ultimate solutions.


This acceptance of resistance means that one must remain flexible to adapt to what is occurring... Aikido is a process of not being drawn into a tug-of-war or a conflict. The Aiki­do solution to force-seeks-force may be stated as: Never put power at the point of contact. If an attacker grabs the wrist of an Aikidoist, the Aikidoist "gives" the wrist to the attacker. This causes the at­tacker to feel in control. He feels no force resisting him and so he does not experi­ence a heightening of tension and con­flict. His sense of power is not threatened. Yet, subtly, the Aikidoist is moving other parts of his body, radiating out smoothly from his hara [belly]. The result is that the at­ tacker usually feels totally in control un­til, quite suddenly, all balance  is inexplicably lost, and he tumbles to the ground.             (ibid)


What the above points to is the "Effortless effort" - following the Way.  If we forget our ego, our mind play and be in the moment, connected to the primary (e.g., true self, heart), There is resolution.

                                 
Gozo Shioda and Art of Aikido (3 min.)

* Note: For those who know my New Manufacturing Challenge book, or New Shop Floor Management book, there are stories related to this.  It is about empowerment and become the master of destiny.  BTW, one well known exercise in Toyota is called "Maru-kaite-chon" or white circle on the floor, in which Toyota a manager is instructed by Mr. Ohno, the father of Toyota Production System, to stand for a day, two or a week, just observing the production line (until he gets it! to know where the waste is! and how to address it)


* In my video at youtube called "Ten-mei," (from 15.40 for about 4 min.), or "Order from Heaven," I described my experience of something like me being in Aikido with Taiichi Ohno, where he did not exert his energy, yet I was thrown out by my own effort, and came up with new insight and conviction to move forward - with the idea of being the master of my own destiny.  This example may points a way of how we may breakthrough the impasse.